Let’s talk about sex…

by nikkilehman2013

The other day my husband and I were discussing Christianity and sex.  A little Google search revealed there are too few helpful resources in the blogosphere on the topic.  Granted, this is an issue that Christian authors have definitely written about.  There are a myriad of books to choose from, but I didn’t want to sit down and read a book.  I was just looking for a good article or blog.  Having been left unsatisfied with my internet search, I decided to start my own blog series on sex.

Christianity and Sex

We live in a world obsessed with sex.  This is nothing new and will never change.  We were designed with an innate will and desire to have sex.  It is an intentionally created part of us that will always be expressed in one form or another.  That’s not the problem.

The problem comes with our sinful nature.  Sin separates us from God and mares His design.  Something that is good and a part of us becomes twisted and abused.  Something God designed for good, man takes and destroys.

But there is a bigger problem.  You see, God designed sex.  God created us to have sex.  And you know what?  The church has largely said “no thank you” and handed it to the world.  We let the world define and talk about sex while most Christians treat the topic as taboo.

The Result

The result is a body of sexually silent or deprived believers and a world that is playing with a gift they don’t understand and can’t fully comprehend.  This leads to a complete misunderstanding of sex and sexuality.

Pornography is a perfect example.  On the one hand, many people derive their sexual standards from content in pornography, and if their sex life doesn’t compare with these artificially epic levels, they feel they are missing the mark.  On the other hand, many Christians are rightly disgusted by the industry and don’t want their sex life to look anything like it.

This has caused many believers to wrongly associate pleasurable aspects of sex with being worldly.  Rather than approaching Scripture and defining what is acceptable for the marital bedroom, the Church has allowed the world to corrupt their beliefs of sex, and to believe that many pleasurable aspects of sex must be sinful because they are reminded of pornography or sex in media.

This thinking destroys the gift of sex, which married couples were meant to enjoy.

The Solution

So what role should the church play in this? The church is already diligently working to help people understand the dangers of pornography and sexual sin, but that is only one side of the solution.  The church must also start to converse about what a truly healthy sex life looks like.

I mean a real conversation, not one that only promotes abstinence until marriage.  One that teaches how totally exciting and thrilling it is to have just one partner to share your sex life with.  A new movement that tells people the truth about sex.  The real truth.

The truth that if you’re a Christian, you have the tools and resources to have the very best sex life possible.  Why?  Because sex was designed by God, and therefore can be most fully understood by His people.  The world should look at Christian couples and see the best example of a healthy, pleasurable, and complete sex life.  The world should be looking into Christian blogs and forums, wondering what it is makes our sex lives so complete.

And what makes our sex lives so complete?  A personal relationship with God and understanding His Scriptures.  This leads to true understanding of His perfect love and selflessness, which is then expressed in all aspects of our relationships and marriages.  Christ will be glorified by His Church talking about and biblically defining sex, which will also reveal truths about His character to the world.

The world will remain largely ignorant, and believers will remain largely conflicted, if we refuse to talk about sex.  So Christian, let’s talk about it…